Worrying about how he feels makes the situation worse. Spend that time literally doing anything else, anything. Stop putting mental energy into figuring out what he’s thinking, how he’s feeling, if he’s losing interest in you, and so on. Even the most obtuse, most emotionally oblivious men can pick up on vibes because more than 90% of communication is non-verbal. When you’re in this headspace you send out a desperate vibe that he will pick up on. When you try to win him over, you are essentially lowering your own value, you’re saying “I’m not worthy of you, but I hope you’ll pick me anyway!” Now would you want to date someone who was sending out that message? Exactly. If you keep coming at him he’ll just become more annoyed with you and will pull away further. And if he’s pulling away because it does have something to do with you, then again, there’s nothing to do. It might have nothing to do with you so there’s nothing to prove here.
This is useless for several reasons.įirst, acting this way infringes upon his freedom and makes him feel smothered (and makes you look desperate). She is extra attentive, goes above and beyond, and tries to be what she thinks he wants. She thinks maybe if he re-discovers how amazing she is, then he’ll come back. When a guy pulls away, a lot of women react by trying to win him over again. OK, so now that you know the why, let’s talk about what not to do when this happens. If one person has a more insecure or anxious attachment style, they may have a hard time when their partner pulls away and then it becomes a relationship problem. This actually makes for a healthy relationship. It’s normal for people to cycle between wanting to get close and wanting to spend time on their own. It’s important to correctly identify which is which, but if you don’t know, it’s better to assume he needs space to work out his own emotions, this way you don’t make things worse. He is losing interest in you (this is the nightmare scenario women fear). This is a common male response to stress.Ģ. It could be something at work, financial issues, emotional issues, family issues… whatever the case, he’s stressed and emotionally overwhelmed and wants to deal with it on his own. He’s dealing with something and just needs space to work through it. There are two primary reasons a man will pull awayġ. So what now? I’m going to tell you exactly what NOT to do when he’s pulling away. Maybe he doesn’t text as often… he doesn’t seem as enthusiastic about you or the relationship…or maybe it’s nothing you can put your finger on, just a feeling in the pit of your stomach.
You feel powerless and scared and have no idea what the right move is.Įverything seemed to be going so well but now something is off. Their intentions are good, but most of the time they inadvertently make the situation worse and push him even further away. When a man starts to pull away or withdraw, a lot of women reflexively panic and do what they can to bring him back and get the relationship back on track. By Sabrina Bendory Updated November 30, 2022
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